cockwaffles aside, i wanted to talk about hope. my life has basically sucked pretty hard since my grandpa died, but it seems like now things are starting to look up again.
my family, a lot of whom i haven't gotten along with in years due to various reasons, stopped treating my brother like he's invisible. while i'm still not treated that great by some of them, i am grateful that they remembered his existence.
my cousins are either completely grown, or just about there, and i've been watching their lives unfold. it's kind of weird really, since i have tangled memories of when they were little and i was playing with them or babysitting them or whatever. but the adults they're becoming are so full of possibility, i'm kind of excited to see where their lives take them.
hell, one of my cousins that i used to be super close with has actually been clean for a couple years now. she's in college, got a job, doing really well. i'm really proud of her too, since we're fairly close in age.
some of my friends are getting married, having babies, and i'm pretty happy for them. it's nice seeing the people i care for having good times.
my art is starting to flow again, which hasn't happened either at all, or just barely since grandpa died. i also have mui mel too, which has been nice.
so instead of my world being dark, the dawn is finally coming again. so i am full of hope.
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