the show must go on

i had meant to write this a few days ago, but i've been too rattled. so here it is.
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the show must go on. that's the mantra that had repeated through my mind all week. the show must go on. DJ's net crapped out and we were a half hour late starting? the show must go on. i stepped up, grabbed the stream, did my best. had one of my worst anxiety attacks in a long time.

did show number two. played the wrong song, announced the wrong name. the show must go on.

put out fires. soothed dancers. consoled dancers. kept the audience happy. made sure everything ran smoothly while it felt like i was so out of control i would shatter apart at any second. the show. must. go on.

show number three. i hauled ass home from a movie on my bike in the rain. almost didn't make it. the show must go on. a buddy of mine had my back and kept everything going smoothly until i could take over. then there were glitches with the stage and a couple dancers cried. the show must go on.

somehow, i pulled it off. i played three shows, and ensured the audience had no idea that so many things had gone wrong. i was unbelievably stressed out, was actually dreading doing the third show.

i made up an excuse to not do the last show. i was at my wit's end. i had a backup in place for a different DJ, and i slept well for the first time all week. the show must go on. i don't know how it went, and i quite frankly don't care. i did my job, and that's all that mattered.

i ensured that the show went on.